Sometimes just following a voice is grounding. Here is Wild Geese, a poem by Mary Oliver. Ask yourself to stay present to the poem itself, the tones, the syllables themselves, allowing yourself to really hear it.
…that you may not have heard. Someone drew this site to my attention.
Try to take a few of these on the ‘road’ – Aka, try them out. Try just a couple that you can back up with actions. For instance, if you say: “You have a fair point”, let yourself be impacted by their opinions. If you say “I’m listening”, listen. And if you don’t have time to listen at the moment, say that. Honesty behind these words will work more wonders that the words alone. So maybe “I love being your parent” becomes, “I love being your parent even when I’m too tired to show it”! Try to use the ones that speak your children’s language, not necessarily the ones you value most.
See what happens when you try a couple on yourself – speaking to yourself. Choose tolerable ones, not the hardest ones:
So here is my voice and a grounding script on Quicktime Player. I’ve been asked to do this over the years, and always hesitate. I sound a bit weird to myself. (But isn’t that what people always say about hearing themselves!) Feel free to let me know what you think – I’ll work on them. The goal is not necessarily relaxation. This is to get grounded and present. You may have to do it several times, or take it from here and do the parts repeatedly that work better for you. Also move! Move your body, stretch a bit as you do these – even though what’s here is mostly not moving:
Grounding exercises for when you feel un-anchored or are experiencing overwhelm, mild or strong dissociation or other challenges with staying present. This is from a website directed towards men and male experiences with mental health issues stemming from abuse or adversity. Yet, there is much relevant for any human being. (See the “no straight lines” video about maps.) Visit here when you need some reminders of grounding exercises to try – find the ones that suit you.
Last week I saw a video of a therapist reviewing and teaching a type of breath-work that involved a person pushing breath out strongly by pinching in their abdominal muscles. The instructions also involved acting as if one is blowing out a candle that is about arms length away. She suggested to re-seed one’s breath and reset an upset system by attempting to blow out this imaginary candle about 10 times, before your body may allow you to move into deeper, intentional breathing. It was a good video, but I should have noted its location (URL) at the time.
However, this simple list from “The Utopian Life” also appears to be quite good. If you have success with it, feel free to email me with what you notice. (I’m getting no payment for mentioning them. Check out their site if you wish).